Being Easter Weekend, warehouse sales are a-plenty, and for the first time ever uniform of hipsters and apparently 12 year old girls, American Apparel has a rummage sale, in Brick Lane. Warning bells should have been going off then considering 28 000 RSVP-ed on Facebook. To be honest, that doesn’t mean anything, I click attending on every single event, and I’m in my PJs by 8pm every day.

American Apparel been hosting these rummage sales for a while, I guess they thought people would be more orderly. But posting their price list on Twitter may not have been the best idea…

Because this happened…

I can’t help but laugh. I arrived at 10am and met my friend Sumeet and Surina, his sister. They were by All Saints, I thought I’d try get an Oxford for £10, because I like shirts and £10 is a bargain. Sumeet wanted a hoodie, and Surina wanted to have a peek and see if there was anything exciting to buy.

The queue was orderly… then everyone started running and screaming. I thought Beyonce had turned up (MMMMHMMMM HONEY B) , which is probably the only reason I’d run and scream. Or Placido Domingo.

We were (???) but we walked briskly along. What in front of us was the biggest sea of jailbait I’ve seen since tutoring at inner city comprehensives. My god, I was alarmed.  So many 12 year olds! Why were they allowed out? They should have been at church, praising the Lord. Tsk.

Kids were climbing up lampposts, over cars, screaming, crying…. it was how I’d imagine  if Justin Bieber turned up. Apparently he’s quite the in-thing these days. Then the coppaz turned up, well two coppaz turned up, and looked like they were about to faint. I don’t blame them, two batons against 20, 000 screaming kids.. that’s some risky odds… I wouldn’t like to take my chances.

At 11am, I went for a walk around the back.. I was actually planning to go home, I don’t like American Apparel that much. I started chatting to the security guard and manager who poor guys, were absolutely overwhelmed. They weren’t UK staff, they had come in from Europe and their pupils were as large as saucers. A woman came and started yelling about how she came down from Liverpool. It’s not the Next sale you know, jam.

But when these ratty little teenagers in their ‘trendy’ ripped tights and attempted to ‘bribe’ the security guard, I wanted to punch them. SHUT YOUR FACE HOLE. Jesus. How do they even know about American Apparel? It’s not cheap,  I guess it’s why they were at the sale, but really? I blame Mark Zuckerman for opening Facebook to everyone. Why couldn’t you leave it to university and work networks?

We toddled off for a hot choc at LCB, sauntered back a couple of hours later, and people were still waiting – and there was more five-o around, but sadly not kitted in riot gear, or pepper spray. I know you can’t attack children, but COME ON! They were mental.

Anyone who queues up from 6am for American Apparel deserves to be subject to some police brutality, if only to knock it into their heads, THAT ALL THEY SELL IS COLOURED JERSEY. No-one knows it’s sweatshop-free – or do they care? Because they don’t, and that’s sad. Well Dov Charney needs to recoup that $5 million he lost to Woody Allen.

The police closed it down until further notice, because the look of panic in their eyes over the leggings army was priceless, and also no-one knows how to queue. And really, £12 hoodies aren’t worth it.

To abate the growing hysteria and anger;

FINAL UPDATE!!!:

Today’s response at our first Rummage Sale in London was overwhelming and humbling. Dangerous behavior in the queue prompted the police to close the event down until they could ensure security for everyone involved. In our many rummage sales, we’ve never witnessed anything like it and are disappointed and sorry that it happened. Fortunately we were able to work out an urgent arrangement for extra security that will allow us to continue to run the rummage sale as planned this weekend and Monday.

We know this change of plans caused some problems and we’re doing everything we can to make it up to you. We’ve trucked in more than 150,000 Made in USA garments (price list: http://twitpic.com/1cnyso) and we’re excited for you to see them. We’ll be constantly replenishing every second the sale is open so for your comfort and the continuation of the sale, so there is no need to get there early or to come all at once. We’ll make sure there is good stuff when you’re here. If we can avoid excessive crowds in the morning tomorrow it will make it easier for the sale to continue.

We know that today was a disappointment and scary for many of you. For that, we are deeply sorry. Not only do we want to make it up to you, but we want to thank you for your dedication to our company. Below are several options for people who can’t make the sale this weekend or just don’t want to anymore. We hope that you can at least leave with a little something. Just enter the discount code at checkout from our UK webstore.

-AALNDNFAV (40% OFF some of the most requested rummage sale styles) (link: http://store.americanapparel.co.uk/london-rummage-favorites.html)
-LNDNRMG25 (25% OFF he entire webstore) (link: http://store.americanapparel.co.uk)
-EVENTPAGE (25% OFF a purchase at our UK retail stores. Just bring the FB event page with you to redeem)

Make sure to follow us on Twitter (http://twitter.com/americanapparel) and Facebook (http://www.facebook.com/AmericanApparel) for updates about the sale. Things are very much still subject to change and we want you to know about them right away. If there are any major concerns, problems, or feedback, please email info@americanapparel.net and we will do our best to respond right away.

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Updates from early Friday
!!!!!!!!!WE’VE BEEN TEMPORARILY SHUT DOWN BY THE POLICE. We’re trying to get this reopened for you as soon as possible. Stayed tuned to this page or Twitter for updates. They are concerned about the crowd outside the venue for the time being so if you can disperse, please do. Thank you. We know you’re excited and won’t let you down!!!!!!!!!

Update II: AALNDN10 gets you 15% off our UK webstore for the next 10 days! (redeem code at checkout) We’re figuring this out. Thank you for your patience so far.

UPDATE III: The police have closed our London Rummage Sale for today to ensure everyone’s safety. We’re doing all we can to stay open for the wknd and will let you know. To everyone who has waited so patiently: Please Take 25% OFF anything in our UK site (use code LNDNRMG25) or print this for 25% off at our UK retail shops… (exp 1 wk, not valid w/ other offers). We’re going to make this up to everyone. Thank you!

All I can say is LOL LOL LOL. And I don’t want an Oxford that much, thx. :)

The lesson to be learned is, teenagers ruin everything. And Facebook is devil spawn ;)